The Borowitz Report offers some exclusive information on the CIA Friends & Family Eavesdropping Plan:
In a sign that the Bush administration intends to ratchet up its program of domestic surveillance, the Central Intelligence Agency today announced that it was offering what it called a “Friends & Family” eavesdropping plan.
Under the new plan, American citizens would reap significant discounts for long-distance calls in exchange for permitting the CIA to listen in on all of their conversations.
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With many Americans unhappy with their current long distance service, the CIA hopes that consumers will decide that having a CIA agent listening in on all of their conversations is a small price to pay for fewer dropped calls, which the CIA’s eavesdropping plan promises.
