The Onion reports on a new theory gaining ground with evangelical scientists looking for an alternative to the "theory of gravity:" Intelligent Falling:

"Traditional scientists admit that they cannot explain how gravitation is supposed to work," [Intelligent Falling expert Dr. Ellen] Carson said. "What the gravity-agenda scientists need to realize is that 'gravity waves' and 'gravitons' are just secular words for 'God can do whatever He wants.'"

Some evangelical physicists propose that Intelligent Falling provides an elegant solution to the central problem of modern physics.

"Anti-falling physicists have been theorizing for decades about the 'electromagnetic force,' the 'weak nuclear force,' the 'strong nuclear force,' and so-called 'force of gravity,'" [gravity critic Gabriel] Burdett said. "And they tilt their findings toward trying to unite them into one force. But readers of the Bible have already known for millennia what this one, unified force is: His name is Jesus."

Food for thought... ;-p