{"id":14047,"date":"2004-07-21T11:42:00","date_gmt":"2004-07-21T11:42:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/2004\/07\/21\/2004-bulwer-lytton-winners\/"},"modified":"2004-07-21T11:42:00","modified_gmt":"2004-07-21T11:42:00","slug":"2004-bulwer-lytton-winners","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/2004\/07\/21\/2004-bulwer-lytton-winners\/","title":{"rendered":"2004 Bulwer-Lytton Winners"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>The <a href=\"http:\/\/www2.sjsu.edu\/depts\/english\/2004.htm\" target=\"_blank\">2004 Bulwer-Lytton contest winners<\/a> have been announced.  For those of you that haven&rsquo;t heard of <a href=\"http:\/\/www.bulwer-lytton.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">the contest<\/a>, the goal is &ldquo;childishly simple: entrants are challenged to submit bad opening sentences to imaginary novels.&rdquo;  This year&rsquo;s winner in the fiction category is hilarious:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>She resolved to end the love affair with Ramon tonight &hellip; summarily, like Martha Stewart ripping the sand vein out of a shrimp&rsquo;s tail &hellip; though the term &ldquo;love affair&rdquo; now struck her as a ridiculous euphemism &hellip; not unlike &ldquo;sand vein,&rdquo; which is after all an intestine, not a vein &hellip; and that tarry substance inside certainly isn&rsquo;t sand &hellip; and that brought her back to Ramon.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Be sure to check out the winners in other categories, as well as runners-up and honorable mentions&hellip; \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n<div class=\"blogger-post-footer\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1\" height=\"1\" src=\"https:\/\/blogger.googleusercontent.com\/tracker\/3501955-109041042860919550?l=www.driko.org%2Findex_blogger.html\" alt=\"\" \/><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The 2004 Bulwer-Lytton contest winners have been announced. For those of you that haven&rsquo;t heard of the contest, the goal is &ldquo;childishly simple: entrants are challenged to submit bad opening sentences to imaginary novels.&rdquo; This year&rsquo;s winner in the fiction category is hilarious: She resolved to end the love affair with Ramon tonight &hellip; summarily, &hellip; <\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/2004\/07\/21\/2004-bulwer-lytton-winners\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;2004 Bulwer-Lytton Winners&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[118],"class_list":["post-14047","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-imported"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14047","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=14047"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14047\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=14047"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=14047"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.driko.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=14047"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}