Squeeze Argybargy Pulling Mussels (From The Shell) They do it on camber sands They do it at Waikiki Lazing about the beach all day At night the crickets creepy Squinting faces at the sky A Harold Robbins paperback Surfers drop their boards and dry And everybody wants a hat But behind the Chalet My holiday's complete And I feel like William Tell Maid Marion on her tiptoed feet Pulling mussels from the shell Shrinking in the sea so cold Topless ladies look away A he-man in a sunken shower Shelters from the rain You wish you had a motor boat To pose around the harbor bar And when the sun goes out to bed You hook it up behind the car But behind the Chalet My holiday's complete And I feel like William Tell Maid Marion on her tiptoed feet Pulling mussels from the shell Two fat ladies window shop Something for the mantlepiece In for bingo all the nines A panda for sweet little niece The coach drivers stand about Looking at a local map About the boy he's gone away Down to the next door's caravan But behind the Chalet My holiday's complete And I feel like William Tell Maid Marion on her tiptoed feet Pulling mussels from the shell